SD 40: Early-Bird vs Excessive Force

[Ben Jacobs]

RP Below

2 point early rp bonus for each wrestler's first rp which scores above 10 and is posted prior to Wednesday, June 10th @ 3:30 PM CST.

RP deadline is Tuesday, June 16th @ 11:59 PM CST

Match & segment deadline is Wednesday, June 17th@ 8:30 AM CST.

[E.B. Marcus]

The scene opens to the normal Super 8 motel room in Little Rock, a place where the Beauchamps sometimes call their home. This time it's just one Beauchamp....Early. His only guest in the room today is his cousin and tag team partner Dewey Bird. Dewey sits at the room poker style table, in front of him sits the free plastic cups half filled with water, now turned black from the cigarettes the Bird has thrown in them.

Early: So what did you say to Bettie Lee that had her upset with you the other night, Dewey?

Dewey: Nothing Earl. I think that maybe she was so impressed that you spoke to her, that she started babbling.

Early: You think so?

Dewey: Early, if there's one thing that I know it's women. Remember back in high school when everyone wanted to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with Sally Jean?

Early: Yeah.

Dewey: And who took her to the dance?

Early: You did, Dewey.

Dewey: Exactly. I know women.

Early: But then you spiked the punch and got kicked out of the dance.

Dewey: So did Sally Jean.

Early: But you almost got expelled.

Dewey: It didn't matter to me at the time. That night with Sally Jean passed out in the back seat of my 71' Pinto would have been worth getting kicked out of school.

Early: Didn't Sally's parents call the police for contributing to a minor.

Dewey: Yeah, but I got out of that because we were in the same grad.

Early: But you were 22 and Sally Jean was only 16.

Dewey: Just a numbers game, Early. Love has no age.

Dewey throws his finished cigarette into the cup and pulls out another.

Dewey: Did you pick up that six pack of Papbst I asked for?

Early: I forgot. Sorry man.

Dewey: I gave you money for beer, and you forget it.

Early: You didn't give me any money.

Dewey: I remember telling you to use my half of the money we got paid for the match to pick up beer.

Early: We didn't have a match.

Dewey: Oh. Damn. Nevermind then.

Early: But we do have a match next week.

Dewey: Early, I can't wait until next week for beer.

Early: We'll get beer later.

Dewey: So who we fighting?

Early: Eno Redrum and his new partner Blacksmith.

Dewey: Guess Eno figured out he couldn't cut it by himself, so he went out and got him a partner.

Early: You didn't watch their match against The Bastardos.

Dewey: I must have fell asleep or something.

Early: Passed out.

Dewey: What?

Early: Nevermind. Eno is pretty tough. His partner looks tough too.

Dewey: Cause they beat the Mexiclowns?

Early: Eno almost beat The Phil.

Dewey: Eno has done everything. He's been everywhere. Hell I've heard so many rumors about the guys past that it seems like he should be writing a book instead of wrestling. Might be a number one best seller.

Early: I don't know what you mean.

Dewey: Early, if Eno spent more time focusing on his wrestling skills and less time thinking about his past, then he might have beat The Phil and be the RCW Southern Heritage Champion right now. He can't. That's his way out. The guy is psycho or something. He should be in some loonie bin and not in wrestling. Bet his partner is a black copy of Eno himself.

Early: Don't say that.

Dewey: What?

Early: I'm sure Blacksmith isn't just like Eno.

Dewey: Maybe not in this life, but I bet sometime or another they've done some crap. Hell, even knowing Eno Redrum could get a man killed. There's probably some crazy sniper outside that window now, got a scope aimed right at one of our heads.

Early: There's no sniper.

Dewey: Not at this hotel. Sniper'd probably be scared he'd get mugged and somebody would take his gun and cut off his trigger finger in this neighborhood.

Early: This neighborhood isn't that bad.

Dewey: Maybe he'd be scared some of those bad cockroaches might cut him. They'll cut him bad, they'll cut him real bad.

Early: You watch too much television.

Dewey: I have to find something around here to do. We never have enough money to go to the strip clubs.

Early: We will, Dewey. As soon as we win those RCW Hog Wild Tag titles, we'll have plenty.

Dewey: Right, Early. That's why you are my favorite cousin.



End.

[E.B. Marcus]

The scene is a cheap sleezy hotel in Bangkok. is the capital, largest urban area and primary city of Thailand. Known in Thai as Krung Thep Mahanakhon. It seemed like an easy place to find hookers, some women, some fourteen year old boys pretending to be women. The room is nearly irrelevant, it's the closet that makes the room special, because in this closet hangs a man, by his throat. The rope was tied other places as well, but that's just too graphic for some to hear, even if it is true. The man is kung fu legend David Carrotdean. His death at the time is unknown...that is until they showed up. The Invistigative Team Known As Early-Bird.

They park their completely tricked out 71' Pinto outside on the street. Don't ask how they got it to Thailand, you wouldn't want to know the answer to that. They get out and adjust their polyesther suits. Bird lights a cigarette, as he does on occasions like today....one that ends in "y".

The group makes their way upstairs where the local Bangkok police are already investigating what could be a suicide, what could be an accident, or what could be a murder. The fate of Carrotdine's death lies in the hands of Early-Bird.

Lt. General Warpoo: At the first arrival it seemed that Mr. Carrotdine's death was simply suicide, but upon finding the ropes affixed they way they were, we can't rule out an accident or even murder.

Early: Is there any reasons at this moment to think that a Thai hooker was involved?

Lt. General Warpoo: We don't have hookers in Bangkok.

Dewey: Tell it to the media, Warpoo. I happen to personally know that there's hookers on every street corner. So, Warpoo, are you going to tell the truth.

Lt. General Warpoo: YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH.

Early: Oh, but we can. We're just getting started.

Dewey: YES, I HOPE THEY DIE AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL.

Early: What?

Dewey: Sorry. Nevermind.

Early: I noticed that Mr. Carrotdine's hands are tied behind his back. I know that he was very fluent in Kung Fu. Some say he was the Kung Fu King, but I find it really hard to believe that he could have tied his hands behind his own back in that fashion. And I happen to know that Mr. Carrotdine is fluent in the ancient ways of the Wanking Crain, but I'm ruiling out this as an accident.

At this point, Dewey realised that there's a bottle of cheap tequila on the nightstand beside the bed. He examines it and discovers that it's also got dark red lipstick on it. After another examination of the body, he notices that it doesn't belong to David Carrotdine.

Dewey: Someone else was in this room.

Early: How do you know?

Dewey: Just a feeling. Well, and that there's lipstick on this bottle.

Early: Good work, Dewey.

Dewey: Now, Lt. Warpoo, leave us be to finish our work.




Back to reality.... We see Dewey Bird passed out on the sofa at the Super 8 Motel.


TO BE CONTINUED.....




MAYBE...........

[Eno Redrum]

From Bastards To Inbreds

[Eno Redrum]

From Bastards To Inbreds Part II

[Eno Redrum]

Nothing More, Nothing Less

[Eno Redrum]

The Case Begins