SOHK II: Hog Wild Tag Titles Ladder Match

[Ben Jacobs]

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Information
- Roleplays for SuperShows are based on a 100 pt. scale
- RP Limit: 3 per person, per match
- 20 pt. early RP bonus for first rp which scores more then 50 and is posted before Wednesday, July 22nd @ 3:00pm (Board Time)
- RP Deadline: Saturday, August 1st @ 11:59pm (Board Time)
- Match/Segement Deadline: Monday, August 3rd @ 10:00am (Board time)

[Puck/Pyros]

Saratoga, NY. Puck and Pyros are jogging through Congress Park in the rain.

This is as retarded as you. Why the hell are we running through the park in the rain?

Simple, my little piece of hockey equipment. I figure that since we need to be training for our impending tag team title win, and the Sponge Bob marathon is on in 45 minutes, a run through the rain will end training early.

Not Sponge Bob again.
Could be worse, could be The Golden Girls.

Sponge Bob it is. Good grief I hate the Golden Girls.

Did you really mean everything you said about being the first R.C.W. Triple Crown Winner?

Of course I did. I am going to be the first. It starts with those four goobers and we will become Hog Wild Tag Team champions! The first leg of my dominance of the R.C.W.

Wow. I think I want to be the first Triple Crown Champion. You made it sound so fun, I think I'm going to shoot for first ever Triple Crown Champion.


Wait, you're going to what?

Yeah man, why not? I think I can do it. My mind is clean, no more substances in my life, I think I can be T.C.C.!


So then we agree we're going to win the tag straps?

Indeed.

Beavis, Butt-Head, Enokins and Token, you four will realize that the ladder is the staple of TNDS, and that the Hog Wild Belts are going to be ours!

And you will be DOWNED!

fin'

[Nate Sipes/The New Level]

[With their biggest title match to date only days away, the Hog Wild Tag Team Champions of Wacko Carl and Extreme Beavis contemplate many happenings in their lives. From their match to their former mentor to how fast Nate’s relationship with Maya is moving, they discuss it all on their way to conduct their latest promo. They’re not making their way to some place in their home state of North Carolina nor to the Fayetteville Boys and Girls Club. In fact, they’re already in Missouri and are within walking distance of the Family Arena. They’re illuminated in full thanks to the moon light shining upon them as they walk down the sidewalk.]

WC: Alright, I’ll agree that we do need to do something about HJ.

EB: Finally, you’ve come around!

WC: Yeah, well, what do you think we should do?

EB: I think we should get Doug and Nate involved.

[Carl just gives Beavis a confused look.]

WC: What do you mean?

EB: I mean that I think we should all vote on whether or not HJ should be in the 7 Day Army. We’re supposed to represent the greatness of the people and yet he’s basically spitting on everything that they and we stand for.

[Carl just chuckles; thinking about what HJ stands for.]

WC: Are you surprised? He’s an alcoholic wearing a robe who loves to beat people up. How wouldn’t there be a conflict of interest?

EB: Well, I’m just saying that it should be a group decision and I think Doug and Nate should be involved.

WC: Speaking of Nate, have you seen how fast him and that chick he picked up at the bar are moving?

[Beavis laughs as he agrees with his partner.]

EB: Who, Maya? Yeah, she’s already moved in with him. It’s insane.

WC: Do you think she’s trying to pull a fast one on him?

EB: Nate maybe a little naïve when it comes to women but I think he could spot a gold digger if he met one. Besides, they’re pretty happy together right now.

WC: So, you think we should say something about HJ to Doug and Nate but we shouldn’t say something to Nate about his new squeeze? Yeah, that’s not a contradiction.

[Beavis gets an annoyed look on his face.]

EB: Will you just shut up about that stuff for now? We should focus on this match because a Ladder Match isn’t a walk in the park.

[Both men take a deep breath and recover their serious demeanor.]

WC: Well, considering that TNDS is more worried about watching cartoons or four old ladies fighting on TV, I doubt their priorities are straight.

EB: Exactly. Puck and Pyros both want to be a Triple Crown Champion but they’ll never get there until they take this match seriously. They haven’t proven a d*mn thing since we beat them in the tournament, other than they can still argue with each other. Until they get their heads straight, they’ll never be able to touch us.

WC: You’ve got that right.

[They slap each other a high five; the smiles on their faces being not-so-easy to fade away.]

EB: So, have you heard anything from Eno or Blacksmith?

WC: Nothing. Not one word. After Blacksmith had to interfere for Eno in my match and after you beat Blacksmith in your match, neither has been very vocal about SOHK.

EB: It’d be a shame if they wasted this opportunity.

WC: That’s very true. They’ve looked really good as a team but, of course, they still won’t have what it takes to beat us on the second.

[The two men finally make their way to the arena. They walk up to the front entrance and notice two things: two ladders standing in front of the building and a camera crew filming it. They look at each other and laugh before speaking again in a sarcastic tone.]

WC: Oh gee, do you think the ladders are for us?

EB: Yeah, it’s like a certain two guy asked for it or something.

WC: Hey look, there’s some guys with a camera getting ready to film it.

EB: That’s nice of them.

[The New Level walk up to the camera crew; smiles still on their faces.]

Camera man: Is this where you wanted these set up, guys?

WC: Yeah, thanks. We’ll climb up and you can start filming right away.

Camera man: Sounds good.

[Carl makes his way up to the ladder on the left as Beavis does the same with the one on the right. They make sure they’re steady as they sit on the top rung and the camera starts to roll. Both men exhibit a serious demeanor.]

EB: “Too small; too weak; no chance in hell against these guys.” It’s not just what everyone said before my match at the last Southern Dynamite against Puck and Blacksmith but it’s what everyone’s said about me in my career. And yet every time I’ve proven that size doesn’t matter. Ability in the ring is what sets the contenders from the pretenders; greatness from lewdness; the top from the bottom.

WC: Everyone always talks about making it “to the top of the ladder.” How ironic is it that our title match at School of Hard Knocks is a three team Ladder Match. Despite what the other teams are or are not saying this is sure to be one of the greatest ladder matches of all-time. You have the high-flyers in TNDS, you have the pure strength in Excessive Force and you have the all around talent in the champions; The New Level…us.

EB: I hope you guys enjoyed the compliments because that stops right now. I hear that Puck and Pyros have been jogging out in the rain but have been more worried about what’s on TV than this match. You guys think that just because you’ve had a ladder match or two in your past that you can simply get by on that kind of clout? Not even possible. You’re incessant bickering about the simplest of things is giving everyone a headache and despite your best efforts, the only thing entertaining about your promos are when they’re over. And by the way, if you’re just going to use the old “Beavis and Butt-head” joke then it’s time you got new material. Braver men than you have tried that one and all of them have fallen at our feet. All have been knocked back down to the bottom rung.

WC: As far as our other opponents, the ones who thought the triple threat matches leading up to SOHK weren’t important, believe me; it’s important if you get beat or are about to get beat two weeks in a row. You guys were too worried about the match off in the distance that you lost focus of what was in front of you. Whatever aura of invincibility you guys had built up around yourself is now gone and we’re the ones who shattered it. Now, we’ll end your hopes of becoming Hog Wild Tag Team Champions. You guys have been silent since Beavis was victorious at the last show and that’s good. That means that you don’t make excuses about past mistakes. However, it also means that you look like a scared dog tucking their tail between their legs as they run away. I doubt you’re afraid but I’m sure the poor performances have hurt you. Well, prepare for more of it because the tag belts are staying right where they are when SOHK rolls around. Enjoy the moment, guys, because the momentum is solely on a New Level.

[The camera crew turns off their equipment as the New Level makes their way back down the ladders. They shake hands with the crew before walking back the way they came.]

WC: So, what should we do now?

EB: It’s kind of late, man. I don’t really feel like training anymore tonight or going out. We should just rest up for now.

WC: Works for me. We’ll next all the strength we can get for that ladder match. These guys may be down but they’re not pushovers.

EB: That’s true but now they have to prove it.

WC: Also true.

[The two men walk back down the sidewalk as the moon goes behind a cloud; shrouding the night in darkness.]